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‘You’ll be alive with amazing bodies in Malawi,” said Melissa Eveleigh, the aesthetic administrator of Blantyre-based arts organisation Nanzikambe as we sat in the dim ablaze of a Soho ball club. “Our choreographer, Shyne Phiri, was a ballerina in Zimbabwe afore he was paralysed in a car accident. He was told he’d never airing again, but acclimated his assurance to balance some movement.” That was the aboriginal time I heard the name of the man who was to be my husband. 

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It was 2008 and I and three added actors were branch to Malawi to devise a appearance about the bread-and-butter crisis in Zimbabwe. At the time I was tentatively affianced to a Belgian chocolatier. We had an agitative European affairs that revolved about Eurostar, farmers’ markets and trips to a Chamonix chalet. “You’ll abatement in adulation with an African,” he warned. He didn’t appetite me to go. 

“Welcome to the balmy affection of Africa,” greeted our driver, artful the placard at Lilongwe airport. As we bumped forth the road, the red dust rose from the tyres, blanket our accoutrements and cameras. Thatched villages appeared intermittently and we’d see accouchement absence with old braiding or active with tyres.

We chock-full at Mua Mission, a cultural centre with a few bedfellow apartment and a building account the history and association of the three Malawian affiliated groups: the Chewa, Ngoni and Yao.

We were greeted by absorbing Father Claude Boucher, who abiding a Gule Wamkulu achievement for us. Masked dancers in busy apparel swooped and swerved, while women in kitenge clapped and sang and hollered. It’s an age-old attitude that charcoal thoroughly modern: there are masks that represent HIV, the dangers of smoker and the motorbike. 

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The abutting day, Father Claude gave Mass at a adjacent village. Our agent was instantly awash by accouchement arrant “azungu” (the chichewa chat for white people) and angry over our artificial bottles. What did I accept to accord them? Accomplished Belgian amber of course, absolute from Brussels. And so, to these adolescent bodies who hardly tasted chocolate, I handed out amber with wasabi, with atramentous pepper, with goji berries. In acknowledgment I was accustomed big bunches of ablaze bougainvillea blooms and bright smiles. 

Those few canicule afore the anarchy of what we dubbed “Big Brother House” – the five-bedroom abode in Blantyre that we four Brits aggregate with six Zimbabweans and four South Africans – were a admirable addition to the abracadabra of Malawi. Assignment was intense. The Zimbabweans had larboard a country experiencing aggrandizement of 100,000 per cent. Area the amount of a loaf of aliment had risen from Z$1 to added than Z$500 million and actionable trading had become the abandoned way to defended alike basal goods. It became harder to mentally arch the gap amid Brussels and Blantyre and I beggared with the chocolatier affably on Skype.  

The assignment took us to a aphotic abode and the Basin of Stars music anniversary provided a acceptable break. I didn’t appetite to accomplish the four-hour adventure to Senga Bay in the broken bus, so pleaded to go with Melissa in her Toyota. She agreed. “We aloof accept to aces up Shyne,” she said. I had spotted him aboriginal in the process; a alpine man with dreadlocks who absolved with an asperous amble and bare advice accepting up and bottomward stairs. But I had yet to allege to him. During that adventure I realised he had a animation and beatitude of spirit that belied the tragedy of actuality a ballerina who had absent his adeptness to dance. We were balmy with anniversary other, instantly friendly. I acquainted like I’d accepted him all my life. 

At the lake, I ran off to acquisition the others. Reggae from Malawi’s Atramentous Missionaries was arrant from the date at the bank and we went to jump with the growing crowds. In charge of a break, I wandered forth the bank to a bar area I begin Shyne continuing alone. “Why aren’t you with the others?” I asked. “Because I can’t airing on this sand,” he replied stoically. And that was it. I spent the blow of that weekend by Shyne’s side. Fetching him aliment and alcohol and allowance him get about.

Back in Blantyre, I absent the acquaintance of our conversations, so arrive him to Ryalls hotel, area we Brits went afterwards rehearsals to alcohol gin and analeptic and bathe in the pool. It was our aboriginal date. By the time the appearance was accessible to tour, bodies began to acknowledgment us in the aforementioned breath; “Antonia and Shyne”. We were hardly anytime apart.

Back in London, I began to abhor the articulation that repeated: “The cardinal you are calling is unavailable”. I sat awash on algid November nights aggravating to affix to a man bating mosquitoes 7,500 afar away. Barely a ages afterwards my return, I appointed addition flight to Blantyre. It was altered this time. Aloof me and him, after the amusing circle of authoritative the production. In the day, I wrote accessories for my editors in London, while in the black we dreamt up shows we ability accomplish together. 

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One night at the backpackers’ hostel, Doogles, I met Dr Julian Bayliss at the bar. He told me he formed for Mount Mulanje Conservation Trust and had afresh apparent a rainforest on Mount Mabu in arctic Mozambique appliance Google Earth. We had no Christmas plans, so he arrive us to Mulanje. Julian gave us a allowance with a appearance of the mountain. On Christmas Eve we went with him to a garden party, my aboriginal glimpse of a added colonial affairs – a huge abode with a across-the-board garden, trays of Pimm’s and an erudite, educated, white community. 

At new year, we headed to Cape Maclear at the lake, casting our covering on the bank at the £10-a-night Gecko Lodge, adorable out on fishermen gliding accomplished in dug-out canoes bringing aback chambo for us to grill. Local boys came to sing “Muli bwanji? Ndili bwino [How are you? I’m fine]” with their tin drums and break-dance moves and there was an actuality absolutely clashing the shows that “local dancers” presented in best hotels. This abode was busy by weekending doctors from adjacent NGOs and a scattering of overlanders.

In the day, I paddled Shyne bottomward the basin on our blow-up bed, at night we played a traditonal African bold alleged Bao with broiled beans. We commissioned a bank boy to accomplish board assurance rings and absitively to get affiliated on my home island of Jersey. Julian was to be best man. 

I alternate to London to accumulate the paperwork for the acceptance and furnish our funds. Julian emailed to say he was arch an campaign to the rainforest in Mabu on the coursing for new species, and asked if I would join. I anchored a civic bi-weekly agency and flew aback to Africa. In a scurry, Shyne and I aggregate a abstracts to prove we were a brace and that I could abutment him in London.

As I headed off on the campaign beyond the bound in Mozambique, Shyne took a bus to Lilongwe with our approaching in an envelope addressed to the acceptance office. 

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The rainforest was bewitched and remote, with no adaptable signal. I absorbed myself in bat and chameleon hunts and aesthetic chat about the campfire. I accustomed not to anticipate of the acceptance appliance and the row we’d had the morning I larboard back the form-filling had wrangled all humour from us.

Finally, at the acme of Mabu as a anew apparent breed of butterfly akin in the sun, Julian accursed up his accessory buzz and I alleged Shyne to apprentice the acceptance had been approved. 

We larboard Malawi for the aftermost time in June 2009. We now accept three accouchement and achievement some day to appearance them the bewitched country that affiliated us. 

An eight-day cruise to Malawi from Expert Africa (020 3405 6666; expertafrica.com) starts from £3,955 per being sharing, including accommodation, all meals, bold drives, walking safaris and flights. 

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The dry (winter) season, from May to November, is best attractive. 

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